My treatment model is represented in the Practice Logo and in the diagram above. It is a model that I developed years ago to conceptualize our inner life explaining both our negative thoughts and self-defeating behaviors. This model draws from other theoretic models including Jungian, Inner Child Work, and Spiritual Psychology.
To explain the model, imagine that your psyche has different layers. The innermost layer is our Core Self…often referred to as your authentic self and some people call it our Spiritual Self or God Piece…it represents who we are and who we were when we arrived in this world. It is our purest self, untouched, by life’s pain or experiences or decisions. It is also our Source of Wisdom, Knowing and Pure, unconditional Self-Love.
In order to survive, we became very invested in protecting this Core Self. For most of us living on this planet, we became affected by the world around us. Some of us experienced or witnessed abuse, neglect, hurt, rejection or shame and all of that wounding got absorbed by this layer that I call our Wounded Self. It holds all of our pain, our fears, our negative self-defeating beliefs about ourselves and the world around us.
Because we cannot go into the world with this pain nor are most of us able to tolerate it, we develop a host of behaviors that take us away from that pain. For many it’s addictions such as alcohol, drugs, food, shopping, gambling, self-harm and/or sex and love. For others it manifests as codependency with an overwhelming need to take care of others or focus on other people and their problems and issues. For some of us it is a merely checking out by sleeping too much, diving into video games, mindless television, and a general feeling of apathy. I call that our Coping Self.
The outer layer is our Persona. This is the part of us that often shows up in the world looking like we have it together. We go to work, often participate in families or relationships, perform in school but deep down we do not feel like it’s genuine. Often it does not feel genuine, because it usually isn’t. This Persona which is ever changing, is our attempt to be who we think the world, our parents, our partners, our religions, our culture wants us to be or tells us we should be.
The goal of counseling with me is to help you move through these layers to be able to Re-connect to your Core Self. This Core Self is where love lies, both self-love and love for others. It is where Truth lies so that you can be guided to make decisions that serve you. It is where peace of mind and serenity lie as you come to believe and feel that all is well and that there is nothing you need to do to earn or achieve. You come to understand that who you are is perfect and your only job is to become You.
Your life has felt hard because you have been disconnected from your Core Self. The Journey is moving through these layers to reclaim that connection that will lead to You becoming You and designing a life that works and is filled with meaning and purpose and love.
Peace!
Melinda